About Us

Burt Crinklethorn is an entrepreneur, activist, and historian originally from Hartford, VT. A former executive for Enron, Burt is devoted to preserving our nation's values. Through his philanthropic efforts, he is committed to building a wall on the US/Mexico border. His hobbies include skateboarding and the metaverse. 

Linda Crinklethorn is the second wife of Burt Crinklethorn. She has attended such museums as MOMA, the Smithsonian, and Mark Twain's house. Linda completed one semester at Manchester Community College and currently resides in the Buckland Hills Mall.

Alex Traynor is a comedian born and raised in the Greater Hartford area. He is a graduate of Emerson College and has performed at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatres in NYC and LA. Currently, he makes dumb videos for the Internet. Check out his website and youtube channel. Follow him on instagram, tiktok, and twitter.

Also, If this whole thing is not legal - he had nothing to do with this. This was all a complex joke by someone else using deepfakes.

Barack Obama is an American politician who served as the 44th president of the United States from 2009 to 2017. A member of the Democratic Party, Obama was the first African-American president of the United States. He previously served as a U.S. senator from Illinois from 2005 to 2008 and as an Illinois state senator from 1997 to 2004. He is proud to be serving as a consultant for AMFPDB. It Is an honor of a lifetime.

Grandpa Crinkleton is a scientist/ inventor from Miami, FL. He is best known for his research into wormholes. His hobbies include QAnon and Tennis. He is unrelated to Burt & Linda. He is not a grandfather - that is his actual first name.

Shane Helmick is a random guy from Connecticut who, for some reason, makes stickers in his spare time. He did not want us to use his real name or real photo, but we don't care. Check out his Instagram!

Jeffrey Epstein  is an esteemed philanthropist and investor. While our lawyers have advised us to downplay his contributions, this institution owes everything to his generous financial support. Contrary to popular belief, Mr. Epstein is alive and well, living with his wife and four children in Akron, OH.

Banksy is a pseudonymous England-based street artist, political activist and film director whose real name and identity remain unconfirmed and the subject of speculation. His works of political and social commentary have appeared on streets, walls and bridges throughout the world.